Automation

I felt like New York City is where insomiacs unite. I fit right in. I loved it. They way everyone embraced their weirdness and toted it around like a head on a stick. Look at me I am a cannibal and I love it! I didn't eat human flesh while I was there, but i might as well have after experiencing the cuisine at a place called Sarge's. It seemed like everything had tongue in it. All different combinations. You could just get a plain ol' tongue sandwich or comboed it with Corned beef or some other ungodly combination of meat that just made me want to hurl. It was the only place open at 2 am that was near my hotel in midtown. I went searching for pizza and got fish heads instead. Thats the same right? yeah.



Have you ever been to one of those dog training classes? Well there is a game that they play at the end of one of these such classes called pass the pup. Its suppossed to help the pup get used to being around people and interacting with other dogs. Thats what I feel like riding the subway feels like. Everyone is getting used to being around people they normally would not associate with. All squished up together, like one happy family taking a summer vacation, every day!



When I agreed to go on this trip I knew that it would be a risk considering that I was going with my family plus my stepmom's pastor's family and extended family. What I did not know is that they are as about dysfunctional as the Simpsons on holiday at the Bundy's house. I was expecting like the wolf from little red riding hood but the green-eyed monster from Beowolf instead. I fed it some prada and Dolce & Gabana to appease the beast and it became docile until its next sacrifice. Its funny cause they put this front on like they are perfect, but they are so looney. At one point I just laughed. When two pastor's wives get into an argument on the subway to the point where others have to hold them back from fighting, you have to laugh. If people of God can't act Godly what hope do I have in humankind? What beacon of light are they and where are they leading me? Then come to find out that they are sisters and the story gets deeper than that, but I am not going to put their stuff on blast. Plus I don't want to go to hell for blasphemy or some jazz like that. Better to be safe than sorry I say. ;0) Its like they smell your weakness and they start to pick at your flesh like crows eating overripe fruit. One pastor was overweight and they picked on him the whole time.



I did not get to experience NY like I wanted to, cause they wanted to shop the whole time and i only really had one day to do stuff. So the last day I was there, I did what I wanted to do and left everyone behind. That day I went to the International Center of Photography, 5th Avenue and the MAC store. The architecture was interesting. the entrance to the building which was totally underground, was the one glass box that sat above ground and had a spiral staircase that descended into the cerebral pit of technology and geekness giants. What I loved most about was the hustle and bustle. I could have taken pictures of New Yorkers all day. You can tell who the tourists are and who the new yorkers are. new yorkers dont gawk, they walk. When they ride the syubway they stare, not look away and hide behind their hair.



I was a hit to in New York. One gay guy on the street stopped and told me that I was a diva and that my hair was fierce. One little boy about eight turned and looked and me and said real loud, "Now her hair is weird." I looked at him as he turned around in his chair to continue staring at me. I thought that was funny. I am used to the attention now, but at first it made me totally uncomfortable. It still makes me uncomfortable when men stare at you like the want to eat you alive. I can see why New Yorkers don't sleep. They are afraid that some one might just want one taste, a little taste. They look hungry...is so many different ways. In the model way, like I haven't eaten since 1982. In the way like I am going to be famous anyway I can. and Last the city has sucked everything good out of me that the marrow in my bones have dried up.



While I was in New York, I was pathetic. I am having all this fun and only one person sat on my mind like a summo wrestler. I feel stupid cause he totally just wants to take advantage of me and its not even real. I am know that I am being taken and that I am being hustled by this card shark who knows all the tricks, but I can't help but put my money on the table and let it ride. My odds are bad, worse than Vegas. What is this? If it was more ideal than I would give in happily, but its not. For a reason I assume. And I know he is torn about me. I see it in his eyes. Maybe thats not the way its going to be for me. Thats what I am suppossed to learn from this. There has to be something substantial coming out of this besides just a broken heart! Should I try with him? Should I say something, or should I just wait for him if he ever gets his act together? I don't know what to do. Someone said Leos are stubborn and if we are both Leos is there any hope for us?